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Published April 27, 2016

What a time to be alive gamers. New amazing games are being released on the daily, VR is taking off, PS4.5 is coming, E3 is coming, and Nintendo just made their power move. The official Nintendo America Twitter account made two major announcements late last night. The first announcement was that The Nintendo NX would launch March 2017. The second announcement was that the new Zelda would launch on the Wii U & NX at the same time in 2017.

This news has split the community. Some are just excited to hear anything from Nintendo & others feel betrayed because all this means is another Wii U drought is coming. Zelda being pushed back another year leaves the community scratching their heads wondering what they’ll play on their dusty Wii U. This announcement is also confusing because they claim Zelda will be their focus at E3 2016. Does that mean we won’t get an NX reveal E3? If not, then what else will be shown? It sounds like it could be a REALLY dry E3 for Nintendo. No details on the what the NX will look like, it’s specs or controller. No details on what we can expect from the new Zelda title either. So let us speculate and by speculate I mean totally make some shit up.

Okay, so Nintendo’s new NX will be the most revolutionary console known to man. It will run off the same CPU used to power the Geth in Mass Effect so that that’s like 1200 jigga juice watts or something. The NX will be so powerful that the United States military will begin using the NX’s CPU’s to power their Gundam Prototypes. All hell will break loose as nations wage war with powerful Gundams, but mid-2017 Nintendo will release the new Zelda, which brings peace. People will be so busy trying to solve them hard ass puzzles in the Zelda dungeons that they’ll forget all about the fighting. Nintendo will be proclaimed earth’s savior.

The End
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